I hate your praise,

I hate your praise,
Not because I mistrust,
But for it is not enough.
Had I known praise,
I would not need yours.
I hate your company,
You don't give me full attention.
I don't need yours,
But mine gets lost without it.

 

And then I seek mine
Where attention is consciousness.
If I give myself my attention,
Perhaps I can find my heart in love.
Concentration and attention are same.
Can I be alive.

Earth was my canvas

Earth was my canvas.
I sowed it with tears.
Colored within the borders. 
Of my parents estate.

Then the skies broke,
My trees pierced the clouds.
I could no longer paint, 
In frames preconceived.
Their earthen floors crumble, 
Under my neat rows.
Their fences wobble,
Touching my brush strokes.

Now I must only cry,
Call the universe edge.
Seas and space my paints.
Life being my platform.
Infinity my play.

(Yom Kippur 5775)

ותיראן המילדות את האלהים

ותִּירֶאןָ הַמְיַלְּדֹת אֶת הָאֱלֹהִים וְלֹא עָשׂוּ כַּאֲשֶׁר דִּבֶּר אֲלֵיהֶן מֶלֶךְ מִצְרָיִם..

What the midwives did was defying accepted authority and doing what they believed in despite the possible consequence . This is what the torah calls fear of God. Standing up for what you believe in does not mean going around proclaiming those beliefs to those who cannot accept them. So when Pharaoh confronted them they made up some excuse. Getting those babies saved is more important than being authentic.

Standing up for your truth can leave you isolated and homeless. So the torah promises. . וַיְהִי כִּי יָרְאוּ הַמְיַלְּדֹת אֶת הָאֱלֹהִים וַיַּעַשׂ לָהֶם בָּתִּים. God makes a home for these people. They are the midwives of a free nation borne on their principles.